Kokomo Tribune; Kokomo, Indiana

November 10, 2012

DAY: Making a bully change

By Ray Day
Tribune columnist

Kokomo — One of my readers asked me to tell my view of bullying. So here is my look at it. First off, I have to state that I believe that bullies are not born, they are part of a circumstance and association. There are bullies in many fields, including schools, business and even politics. You get more news about them when it is the children who are involved. My parents always taught us to walk away if we could. If not, then stand firm and get in the first punch. Needless to say, most of the time, the bully will walk away or stumble away, depending to how hard you fought back. Going back in my school days at Kokomo High School, there was a very big boy who was always picking on a little guy who was the same age as he was. One day, that little guy decided that he had enough and now was the time to correct the situation. So he told the big guy that as soon as school was over, they would meet over in an alley across the street from where the post office is now. Word got around fast that there was going to be a fight and a large group, including me, went right over to get a good view of the fight.

Here was a boy who was over 250 pounds and another one about half the size. They fought for almost a half hour and both were so tired they couldn’t stand up. The fight was finally broken up and as we started leaving to go home, those two boys were standing and talking and shaking hands. From that day on, there was one less bully because someone decided that he had enough. Fear that comes with a bigger person who wants to always take on someone smaller, goes a long way until someone decides to take that step just once and take the other one down.

In business or in the factories, you will always have that one person who believes that he or she is dominant over another. Until you revolt, you remain a victim of the bully. Believe it or not, there are bullies in the field of politics. Through the years, I have been witness to many times when big meant that you could walk over a small person instead of just walking around them.

We have it in the schools, and we even have it in our election process. Many times you can be friends with someone who treats you like a brother and still be a bully to your friends.

So let’s get real and find out why this is true in life. Back many years ago, a friend decided to run for mayor of our great city but was told he couldn’t do it because the party had already chosen who they wanted on the ballot. So that friend decided that in a free country, he should be allowed to run for any office he wanted to and so he switched parties and backed the eventual winner. That man was and still is a part of the city of Kokomo who had Kokomo in his heart and he wanted to make that mark in time. This not only happens here but also in the House and Senate where you go with the leaders because they will take you down if you don’t. Over time these types of bullies run with a strong arm because they have others scared of them. Bullies need to encounter fear in order to be a part of a community. We can’t allow them to win any fights except their own. Walk away or stand firm.

Ray “Uncle Ray” Day can be reached via email at uncleray@earthlink.net.