“No, we’re all in danger! This means you’re going to use that chain saw.”
The next day, I dug through the huge storage box in the garage filled with barbecue and gardening equipment, sprinkler heads and rusty tools. I found the implement and cradled it gingerly in my arms. How am I supposed to start this thing? I wondered. There was one doo-dad labeled “choke,” and I did. There was also a little plastic bubble that I vaguely remembered you have to push several times. Not sure why. I pulled the cord once … twice … 30 times. Suddenly, the motor began to hum. But the chain didn’t turn. I needed help.
I didn’t want to look stupid, so I checked online and armed myself with just enough information to be as dangerous as the chain saw. I found a small nearby motor repair shop and drove over. An elderly gentleman asked if he could assist me.
“Yes, I think the clutch isn’t engaging and there’s a sprocket misalignment that’s making the chain stick,” I said, but I didn’t have a clue what I was talking about. He picked up the saw, pushed a button and said: “The safety was on.”
I didn’t bat an eye. “Thanks! What do I owe you?” I asked the man, who now looked vaguely familiar to me.
“Forget it,” he graciously offered. Then, as I started to leave, he added: “Be careful, Mr. Wolfsie. You’re about to walk into another plate glass window.”
Dick Wolfsie is an on-air personality at WISH-TV Channel 8 and weekly contributor to the Kokomo Tribune. Contact him at Wolfsie@aol.com.