Published: May 31, 2009 11:56 pm      

BEAS: NBA season drags on and who cares?

Forget June 21. Summer officially begins when the kids have exhausted their final day of school. Now all we can do is hope the NBA playoffs have concluded by the time they go back.

How is it the NCAA can lasso 65 teams and still determine a champion in a comparatively abbreviated period of time, but the pros must block off what seems like half the calendar while implementing 16 franchises?

Repeat after me. Best . . . of . . . seven. Unless your favorite club journeys deep, the NBA playoffs are as riveting as watching your neighbor water his crabgrass. Le Bron James and Kobe Bryant going 1-on-5 might be a testament to each player’s individual greatness, but at the same time it reveals just how marginal their supporting casts are.

While on the topic of mediocrity, the not-at-all-awaited Los Angeles-Orlando series promises to be a television ratings bust. Orlando has a good team, and therein lies the problem. We have become such an individualized society that collective greatness no longer appeals to the basketball masses the way it once did.

We want 1-on-5 and would take 1-on-7 in a heartbeat if the rules permitted. We thirst for You Tube fodder because, well, silly stuff like final scores have sadly become secondary.

I say the Takers take it in six, Phil Jackson is again a genius and barely anyone outside these two cities actually gives a hoot. The good news for the NBA is that its over hyped and underwhelming playoff structure isn’t the only thing ailing sports these days. Here are more:

JOSE CANSECO

The master at pride-swallowing endeavors in order to make a buck, this once-feared baseball player, author of 462 career home runs, is now little more than a sideshow. If Canseco has an agent, he should fire him immediately. As if that spot on The Surreal Life two years ago wasn’t embarrassing enough, Canseco has since moved to the ring where he has been pummeled by former NFLer Vai Sikahema and 7-2 mixed martial arts competitor Hong Man Choi.

In Canseco’s defense, he did battle B-list actor Danny Bonaduce to a draw. No word as to if David Cassidy and Susan Dey were working Danny’s corner. Jose, C’mon, get happy.

BRETT FAVRE

He’s retiring. Wait, no he’s not. He is. Uh, no he isn’t. Anybody else suffering from whiplash trying to figure what Favre is doing and where he’s doing it? Why we’re so consumed by this story is baffling. Favre was terrific in his prime, but that boat left the dock years ago.

LANE KIFFIN

We may soon find out if the new University of Tennessee football coach really does bleed orange. Never has someone with a 0-0 record made so many stupid comments that in turn made so many enemies.

Florida coach Urban Meyer, whom Kiffin accused of being a cheater, wants a piece of him. The teams meet Sept. 19 in Gainsville and the Vols at that point should be 2-0 after peppering Western Kentucky and UCLA in Knoxville. Here’s hoping the Gators jump out to a 40-0 halftime lead . . . and then really pour it on in the second half.

The AL CENTRAL

You know you stink when the second-place ballclub, the Chicago White Sox, are two games below .500 and only four games out of first place. Kansas City remains in contention, for heaven’s sake.

Mike Beas is a freelance writer/columnist and Kokomo native who resides in Carmel. He may be reached at mbeas@att.net.